Random Post

So there hasn't been much news recently regarding the film. There's been a bunch of toy photos put out there, but I'm not really concerned about them. Apparently the yellow bulldozer member of the Constructicons is gonna walk around on four legs. That's probably going to look completely kickass onscreen, kinda like when that Gremlin turned into a spider in "Gremlins 2."

I bought a movie theater display poster with the 6-26-2009 date on it; I'm not sure if it's any sort of collectors item now that that's not a valid date, but it's still a badass poster.

And I suppose Megan Fox finally wised up and realized that I'm available. She probably reads this blog.

My mature response

"Ephland, we get it, you don't like the designs. Its cool that you have your opinion, but don't go saying other people are wrong because they like it or think it would look better in motion. You seem to be trying to pass off your opinion as fact, and that is not cool."

- girafeswordsman, tfw2005.com member
via the forum



- ephland, autobot twin hater
via my friend's alternate lifestyle

WTF?

What the fuck? Whoa that's fail. Why, TransFormers?

I mean, really? No one at Hasbro, or ILM, or even Chevrolet thought to maybe raise their hand in a meeting and say "Umm, did I just wake up from a coma and everyone started tweaking on meth while I was out?" Really? Those heads don't even look like they belong on the toy. I understand Chevy is wanting to promote vehicles (which, let's be honest - these probably aren't geared toward the Transformers crowd), but still... these designs really are piles of shit. They're not trendy, cool, slick, funny, or creative. And I don't really give a fuck about context - these are AWFUL and don't seem to fit at all with the imagery promoted so far on this film.

Well, here's Devastator in all his glory. People like to call him "Devy" for short... does this dude look like he wants a nickname? I saw this reveal this morning and pretty much spent all day on the board at tfw2005.com. We got The Fallen today too, here he is...



All I can say about him is "eh." Don't really know this guy, as he's NOT G1! EVERYTHING HAS TO BE G1!!!

Not really, but I really couldn't care less about "The Fallen." Devastator I know. Everybody had that toy as a kid, and even though it was kind of dumb that the team had to carry around a huge head and giant fists in order to make a big robot, he took badass to a whole new level. At a reported 100+ ft tall in TF2, there's really no reason why he can't simply step on those two idiot twins, bitch slap Starscream and then dryhump the Sphinx.

People also need to stop wondering how the Autobots are going to defeat both of these assholes. Quite simply: they're not. Everybody's going to team up and fight The Fallen, which is weird because he really doesn't look all that intimidating. Yeah, I know he's supposed to be on fire. Whoopty shit... the Egyptians defeated him, and they weren't even ninjas.

Here's "The Fallen", or at least the toy version of him. He's supposed to be the big enemy in the movie. The first clue is that his name is in the damn title. But when I first saw him, he reminded me of the big enemy from "A Bug's Life." That's not to say I don't like the design; in fact, I think Kevin Spacey should voice him.

TF2 Trailer Review

First, I really should apologize for all the vitriolic hatred I spewed towards the TF Twins the other day. Not because I was wrong, but because the TF2 trailer simply and purely rocked my ever-lovin' balls off. I thought it was great, and was directed squarely at jerks like me complaining that the movie (or at least the characters) was going to be too goofy. Here are some snapshots, courtesy of tfw2005.com




Here's what is a pretty safe bet will be Ravage in the film, and I'm guessing this dude doesn't turn into a cassette tape. I'm not really sure what's up with his gnarly teeth, or the fact that he's get several rows of them. He's got a big hole in his mouth, which probably means he's a twisted version of a "Lazer Cat", which is a pretty twisted concept to begin with. Andy Samberg does drugs.



And here's Starscream, doing a kickass impression of the Cloverfield monster.



This picture makes me giggle, because that's Optimus Prime leaping through the air ever so gracefully. Never mind the fact that he's 30 feet tall himself, and is completely dwarfed by that robot who just raped an overpass bridge.



If you're reading this blog, then you know what's up with this dude. Sure, he looks like a crab riding a unicycle. And it's a little off-putting to see a giant construction vehicle turn into a crab riding a unicycle. But really, at the end of the day, what kicks more ass than a 60 ft tall crab riding a unicycle? Well...



I'll tell you. It's Megan Fox getting fucked from behind, which as we plainly see here, is in the movie. And the look on that dude's face is exactly what your face looks like if you get to fuck Megan Fox from behind. I'd probably employ a little more hair pulling, myself. But regardless, "Titanic" and "Ben Hur" can kiss their record goodbye, on the strength of this scene alone.